“Larry? Is it pronounced like kal-ZONE? Or like kal-zone-EEE?”

“I say it like kal-zone-EH,” he answers, as though he just stepped off the set of The Godfather.

I forgot he does that.

Pronounces overseas food in overseas accents. Like when he orders coffee and a kwassssohhhhh and I die a little bit inside but also somehow love him slightly more, because Larryisms make my soul sparkle.

Anyway, I present to you, my first-a kal-zone-EH! Just-a like-a Mama use-ta make-a!

It’s garlic roasted pumpkin, asparagus, capsicum and tomato, with spinach, caramelised onion and a cheesy bechamel sauce. I did half Fountain Smokey BBQ Marinade sauce and half tomato pizza sauce.

And I made the dough myself! I never do that, I think this was the second time ever!

Overall, I give the dish a solid 8 out of 5 stars.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟/🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

…so does Ron. Me backyard magpie.

DO WHAT I DID:

THE DOUGH
Olive oil, to make stuff slippery

450g (3 cups) plain flour

1 teaspoon dried yeast

1 teaspoon salt

310ml (1 1/4 cups) lukewarm water (but add it slowly you might not need it all. Or. You might need more. Who knows? Life’s a journey.)

1 tablespoon olive oil

Plain flour, extra, to dust

THEN

Step 1

Brush your bowl with olive oil. In a different bowl, add flour, yeast and salt. Make a little hole in the centre and add your water (bit by bit) and oil. Use a spoon while it’s messy, then your hands when it’s manageable, to mix until combined and a noice dough forms. Add mire flour/water if it goes wonky somehow and needs more flour or water.

Step 2

Tip the dough onto a floured surface and knead for 3 minutes or until almost smooth. Put the dough in the oily bowl and turn to coat in the oil. Cover with cling wrap and put somewhere warm and un-windy  for an hour to prove or until it doubles in bigness.

Step 3

Punch the dough with your fist a couple times. Knead the dough in the bowl for 20-30 seconds or until it is smooth and has returned to its original size.

THE CHEESY SAUCE

(This is a big recipe, makes enough for lasagna, but concept is the same). In a big-medium saucepan, melt about 3 tablespoons of nuttelex, add about a heaped 1/3 cup of plain flour, stir until it comes together, gradually add BONSOY AND ONLY BONSOY and keep stirring to avoid lumps, if it does get lumpy, just get in there with the potato masher or hand whizzer like me. I used nearly a WHOLE box of bonsoy today. Keep gradually adding milk until it settles at a sort of store bought custard consistency.

Then add about, argh, I dunno, two teaspoons of garlic powder and onion powder, some salt, half a teaspoon of mustard powder, cracked black pepper. It should taste yum by now. Taste it. If it’s not yum, you know the drill. More onion and garlic powder. Then, add a handful of whatever vegan cheese you have laying around. Add more milk if needed.

THE GUTS

I used roasted pumpkin, roasted asparagus, spinach, tomato, caramelised purple onion. Tomato pizza sauce.

MAKE IT

Roll and stretch out a chunk of your dough into a circle, sauce the whole circle, but only make a pizza on half of the circle, then fold the empty half over and sort of twist all the edges over themselves one pinch at a time. I don’t know if that tells you properly enough, but just like, google it. That’s what I did.

THEN BAKE IT until golden.